.
ESL 305: Magician Attracts Women


ESL 305: Magician Attracts Women


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David Penny, a world-famous magician who can make elephants and locomotives disappear, is being investigated by the FBI. A woman charged him with sexual assault while she was visiting him on his private island, about 50 miles northeast of Puerto Rico. David uses his island to unwind and relax.

Newspaper reporters have discovered that David likes to "unwind and relax" with young and pretty females from his audiences. Hiding backstage before his magic shows begin, David uses binoculars to check out the pretty women in his audiences. His assistants hand each pretty woman a card.

The top of each card says: "Congratulations! You have been selected to visit David Penny, World-Famous Magician, on his private island. This opportunity might lead to a permanent job working with David all over the world. If you are interested in flying to David's island on his private jet, please fill out the information below. After tonight's show, David will interview you in his dressing room." The bottom of the card asks for personal information: name, address, phone number, marital status, birth date, email address, height, weight, bra size, shoe size, and favorite alcoholic drink.

"Amazingly, most women who get the card fill out all the information, including their bra size," said one assistant. He said that David swore all his assistants to secrecy. "He told us we would be fired if we talked about this to anyone, but the FBI told us we might end up in jail if we didn't cooperate with them."

The assistant told a reporter that David had flown hundreds of women to his island over the past 10 years. None of them, he said, ever got a job with David.

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*Vocabulary:

• alcoholic:
• assault:
• attract:
• audience:
• binoculars:
• bra:
• congratulation:
• cooperate:
• elephant:
• investigate:
• island:
• locomotive:
• magician:
• marital:
• permanent:
• relax:
• secrecy:
• select:
• sexual:
• status:
• unwind:

--------------------

*Yes/No-Questions:

• Is David famous all over the world?

• Is he a musician?

• Can he make elephants disappear?

• Is he being investigated by the IRS?

• Did a woman charge him with sexual assault?

• Does David have his own private island?

• Is his island about 500 miles southeast of Puerto Rico?

• Does he use his island to unwind and relax?

• Does he like to relax with old and fat women?

• Does he use a telescope to check out ugly women?

-------------------

*Fill in blanks:

David Penny, a world-famous magician who can make ____ and locomotives disappear, is being investigated by the ____ . A woman charged him with sexual assault while____ was visiting him on his private island, about ____ miles northeast of Puerto Rico. David uses his ____ to unwind and relax.

Newspaper reporters have discovered ____ David likes to “unwind and relax” with young ____ pretty females from his audiences. Hiding backstage before ____ magic shows begin, David uses binoculars to check ____ the pretty women in his audiences. His assistants ____ each pretty woman a card.

The top of ____ card says: “Congratulations! You have been selected to ____ David Penny, World-Famous Magician, on his private island. ____ opportunity might lead to a permanent job working ____ David all over the world. If you are ____ in flying to David’s island on his private ____ , please fill out the information below. After tonight’s ____ , David will interview you in his dressing room.” ____ bottom of the card asks for personal information: ____ , address, phone number, marital status, birth date, email ____ , height, weight, bra size, shoe size, and favorite ____ drink.

“Amazingly, most women who get the card ____ out all the information, including their bra size,” ____ one assistant. He said that David swore all ____ assistants to secrecy. “He told us we would ____ fired if we talked about this to anyone, ____ the FBI told us we might end up ____ jail if we didn’t cooperate with them.”

The ____ told a reporter that David had flown hundreds ____ women to his island over the past 10 ____ . None of them, he said, ever got a____ with David.

------------------

*Translate into Vietnamese:

................

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ESL 305: Magician Attracts Women

*Vocabulary:


• alcoholic: nghiện rượu
• assault: tấn công, cưỡng hiếp
• attract: thu hút, hấp dẫn
• audience: khán giả
• binoculars: ống nhòm
• bra: áo ngực
• congratulation: khen ngợi
• cooperate: cộng tác
• elephant: con voi
• investigate: điều tra
• island: hòn đảo
• locomotive: đầu máy xe lửa
• magician: nhà ảo thuật
• marital: hôn nhân
• permanent: thường xuyên
• relax: thư giãn
• secrecy: bí mật
• select: chọn
• sexual: giới tính
• status: tình trạng
• unwind: bung ra, tháo dây

===========================================================

*Yes/No-Questions:

• Is David famous all over the world? Yes

• Is he a musician? No

• Can he make elephants disappear? Yes

• Is he being investigated by the IRS? No

• Did a woman charge him with sexual assault? Yes

• Does David have his own private island? Yes

• Is his island about 500 miles southeast of Puerto Rico? No

• Does he use his island to unwind and relax? Yes

• Does he like to relax with old and fat women? No

• Does he use a telescope to check out ugly women? No

==========================================================

*Fill in blanks:

David Penny, a world-famous magician who can make __elephants__ and locomotives disappear, is being investigated by the __FBI__ . A woman charged him with sexual assault while__she__ was visiting him on his private island, about __50__ miles northeast of Puerto Rico. David uses his __island__ to unwind and relax.

Newspaper reporters have discovered __that__ David likes to “unwind and relax” with young __and__ pretty females from his audiences. Hiding backstage before __his__ magic shows begin, David uses binoculars to check _out___ the pretty women in his audiences. His assistants __hand__ each pretty woman a card.

The top of __each__ card says: “Congratulations! You have been selected to ____visit__ David Penny, World-Famous Magician, on his private island. __This__ opportunity might lead to a permanent job working __with__ David all over the world. If you are __interested___ in flying to David’s island on his private __jet__ , please fill out the information below. After tonight’s _show___ , David will interview you in his dressing room.” __The__ bottom of the card asks for personal information: __name__ , address, phone number, marital status, birth date, email ____address__ , height, weight, bra size, shoe size, and favorite ____alcoholic__ drink.

“Amazingly, most women who get the card __fill__ out all the information, including their bra size,” __said__ one assistant. He said that David swore all _his___ assistants to secrecy. “He told us we would __be__ fired if we talked about this to anyone, __but__ the FBI told us we might end up __in__ jail if we didn’t cooperate with them.”

The ____assistant__ told a reporter that David had flown hundreds __of__ women to his island over the past 10 ____years__ . None of them, he said, ever got a__job__ with David.

===========================================================

*Translate into Vietnamese:

Ảo thuật gia thu hút phụ nữ

David Penny, nhà ảo thuật nổi tiếng thế giới người có thể làm biến mất những con voi và đầu máy xe lửa, đang bi FBI điều tra. Một phụ nữ kiện ông cưỡng hiếp cô trong khi cô viếng thăm hòn đảo tư nhân của ông, khoảng 50 dặm cách phía bắc của Puerto Rico. David thường dùng hòn đảo của mình để nghỉ ngơi và thư giãn.

Phóng viên báo chí đã phát hiện David thích "Cởi bỏ và thư giãn" với những phụ nữ trẻ đẹp là khán giả của ông. Nấp sau cánh gà trước khi biểu diễn, David dùng ống nhòm để kiểm tra những phụ nữ đẹp trong số các khán giả. Trợ lý của ông sẽ trao cho mỗi người phụ nữ đẹp một tấm thiệp.

Đầu thiệp ghi: "Chúc mừng! Cô đã được chọn đi thăm David Penny, nhà ảo thuật gia nổi tiếng Thế giới, trên hòn đảo riêng của ông. Cơ hội này có thể mang đến một việc làm ổn định với David trên toàn thế giới. Nếu cô thích bay đến hòn đảo của David trên chuyên cơ phản lực riêng của ông, xin vui lòng điền thông tin dưới đây. Sau đêm diễn tối nay, David sẽ phỏng vấn cô trong phòng thay đồ." Dưới tấm thiệp hỏi về thông tin cá nhân: tên, địa chỉ, số điện thoại, tình trạng hôn nhân, ngày tháng năm sinh, địa chỉ email, chiều cao, cân nặng, vòng ngực, cỡ giầy, và loại thức uống có cồn yêu thích.

"Tuyệt vời, đa số phụ nữ nhận thiệp điền đầy đủ thông tin, gồm cả vòng ngực," một trợ lý nói. Anh nói David bắt các trợ lý phải giữ bí mật. "Ông ta bảo chúng tôi sẽ bị đuổi việc nếu chúng tôi nói điều này với bất kỳ ai, nhưng FBI bảo chúng tôi có thể bị vào tù nếu không cộng tác với họ."

Trợ lý bảo phóng viên là David đã bay với hàng trăm phụ nữ đến hòn đảo của mình trong suốt 10 năm qua. Không có ai trong số họ, anh nói, được nhận việc với David.

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. 1.New To America
. 2.A Haircut
. 3.The Yardman
. 4.Grab Your Umbrellas
. 5.Shopping for Bargains
. 6.Horses to Ride
. 7.A Shower Injury
. 8.Pete's Sharp Knife
. 9.A Good Sandwich
. 10.Sara's Upset Stomach
. 11.Please Marry Me!
. 12.Laundry Day
. 13.A Noisy Neighbor
. 14.The New Realtor
. 15.The Fire Alarm
. 16.Eddie's Short Visit
. 17.Carbon Monoxide
. 18.A Visit to Asia
. 19.School Boys
. 20.The Loose Button
. 21.The Pile of Paper
. 22.Brushing and Flossing
. 23.Raising the Kids
. 24.A Clean Toilet Bowl
. 25.A Love Letter
. 26.A Bird Attacks
. 27.A Daytime Robbery
. 28.Trick or Treat
. 29.The Motorcycle Rider
. 30.Spock Saves His Dad
. 31.Provider Overbills Customer
. 32.The Breakup
. 33.Famous Model Dies
. 34.Shopping Carts Everywhere
. 35.Four Slit Throats
. 36.Does Garlic Mean Garlic?
. 37.A Jealous Girlfriend
. 38.Towns Hit by Snowstorms
. 39.Another Jealous Girlfriend
. 40.She Loves Her Son
. 41.The Doctor’s Exam
. 42.Hospitals Can Make You Sick
. 43.English Is So Hard
. 44.Hollywood Stars and Tourists
. 45.GEICO’s TV Lizard
. 46.Law and Order in LA
. 47.Destruction of Iraq
. 48.Have You Seen This Man?
. 49.LA Traffic Report
. 50.LA Radio News


. 51.Trash Truck Misses Pick-up
. 52.Her First Driving Accident
. 53.You’re Not a Good Principal
. 54.I’ve Got You Covered
. 55.Paris Goes to Jail in LA
. 56.A Year with No TV
. 57.Let’s Buy Some Paint
. 58.I Need Water for My Clients
. 59.Putting Bunny to Sleep
. 60.Where Is That Darn Battery?
. 61.If You Really Love Me…
. 62.The Wedding Gift (1)
. 63.The Wedding Gift (2)
. 64.Does a Tiger Change Its Stripes?
. 65.No Place Like an Open House
. 66."We Could Have All Died!"
. 67.It’s the Thought that Counts
. 68.Who Ordered the Scallops?
. 69.You’re Not My Daddy
. 70.Let He Who Is Without Sin…
. 71.Shopping at the 99 Cents Store
. 72.Betting Big in Vegas
. 73.Priced to Sell!
. 74.The Handyman Comes
. 75.A Woman Has Needs
. 76.A Hot Day and a Cool Pool
. 77.Up, Up, and Away
. 78.Man's Best Friend
. 79.Six Feet Under
. 80.An Unhappy Worker
. 81.Why the Sky Is Brown
. 82.It’s a Small World
. 83.Suspicious Shoppers
. 84.Death Is Part of Life
. 85.Tagger Shoots Woman
. 86.Crime on the Rise
. 87.Too Soft on Crime
. 88.Pluto Chases Kid
. 89.In Harm’s Way
. 90."Semper Buy"
. 91.A Little Respect, Please
. 92.A Dream from Beyond-1
. 93.A Dream from Beyond-2
. 94.A Trip to Egypt
. 95.No Doughnuts for Old Folks
. 96.It’s Just Business
. 97.A Walk in the Wild
. 98.Elvis Is Alive and Well
. 99.Bad Weed, Bad Call
. 100.Shark Attack


. 101.Love in the Hospital
. 102.Interstate Bridge Collapses
. 103.Stop Selling Those Bunnies
. 104.Actor Tries to Kill Himself
. 105.US Senator Says He’s not Gay
. 106.E.Coli Is Everywhere
. 107.Influenza
. 108.The Hospital Orderly-1
. 109.The Hospital Orderly-2
. 110.Flower Power
. 111.Dog Inherits Millions
. 112.Man Holds Staff Hostage
. 113.Young Boy Defends Sister
. 114.Remember Me?
. 115.The Way to a Man’s Heart
. 116.Sail Around the World
. 117.New Dog-Barking Law
. 118.Man Flies in Lawn Chair-1
. 119.Man Flies in Lawn Chair-2
. 120.Cleaning a Dirty Plate
. 121.Her Driving Lesson
. 122.Hurricane Dean
. 123.Adventurer Disappears
. 124.Nursing Student Disappears
. 125.The Lovely Banana
. 126.Smells like Chicken
. 127.The Wedding-1
. 128.The Wedding-2
. 129.The Waiter
. 130.Your Country Thanks You
. 131.D.B.Cooper Lives On-1
. 132.D.B.Cooper Lives On-2
. 133.I’m No Alcoholic!
. 134.48 Homes Burn Down-1
. 135.48 Homes Burn Down-2
. 136.Drought Attacks Georgia
. 137.A Bad MRI Experience
. 138.Body in a Barrel-1
. 139.Body in a Barrel-2
. 140.Red Meat, Gray Water
. 141.All Bite, No Bark
. 142.Tiger Kills Two Men-1
. 143.Tiger Kills Two Men-2
. 144.Red Flowers Make Her See Red
. 145.The Starbucks Robbery
. 146.The Argument-1
. 147.The Argument-2
. 148.The Toilet Tank-1
. 149.The Toilet Tank-2
. 150.Santa Was Molested




. 151.Fire Kills Two Young Girls
. 152.Police Arrest Fire-Starters
. 153.Get out of "Jail"-1
. 154.Get out of "Jail"-2
. 155.New Year Celebrations
. 156.$50K to Waitress-1
. 157.$50K to Waitress-2
. 158.Who Needs School?
. 159.Black Friday
. 160.JFK Assassination
. 161.Don’t Top Off the Tanks
. 162.The Clapper
. 163.Tuberculosis Still Kills
. 164.Old Dogs Become Young Again
. 165.Ham and Eggplant
. 166.A Hole in Her Ear-1
. 167.A Hole in Her Ear-2
. 168.The Drugs Keep Coming
. 169.Missing Husband-1
. 170.Missing Husband-2
. 171.Don’t Get Mad-Get Even
. 172.The Christmas Gift-1
. 173.The Christmas Gift-2
. 174.The Haircut-1
. 175.The Haircut-2
. 176.The Robbery at the Mall-1
. 177.The Robbery at the Mall-2
. 178.The Driving Lesson-1
. 179.The Driving Lesson-2
. 180.The Move to Georgia-1
. 181.The Move to Georgia-2
. 182.I’ll Get a Job in a Restaurant
. 183.A Cleaner River-1
. 184.A Cleaner River-2
. 185.The Spitter
. 186.Kill Those Flies-1
. 187.Kill Those Flies-2
. 188.The Oil Change-1
. 189.The Oil Change-2
. 190.Boy Starts Huge Fire
. 191.Writers Go on Strike
. 192.Please Don’t Hurt Me!
. 193.It’s Just a Little White Lie
. 194.Jury Service in California
. 195.The Rude Golfer-1
. 196.The Rude Golfer-2
. 197.Man Invents Toilet for Cars
. 198.Monkeys Cause Man’s Death
. 199.The Light Eater-1
. 200.The Light Eater-2


. 201.Sara Went Shopping
. 202.Man Injured at Fast Food Place
. 203.A Life-Saving Cow
. 204.Driver Loses Mabel, Finds Jail
. 205.Jerry Decided To Buy a Gun
. 206.Freeway Chase
. 207.Better To Be Unlucky
. 208.Food Fight Erupted in Prison
. 209.How His Pig is Doing
. 210.Goats Being Hired
. 211.A Missing Cat
. 212.Book Him
. 213.Water Under the Sink-1
. 214.Water Under the Sink-2
. 215.Theft Occurs Everywhere
. 216.Eggs and a Bunny
. 217.Goodbye to Clean Couple
. 218.$100 Deposit
. 219.Books Don’t Grow on Trees
. 220.A Murder-Suicide
. 221.New Store and Its Owners
. 222.Hit-and-Run Charge
. 223.Gasoline Prices Hit Record High
. 224.A Festival of Books
. 225.Crazy Housing Prices
. 226.Happy and Unhappy Renters
. 227.Pulling Out Nine Tons of Trash
. 228.Cloning Pets
. 229.Rentals at the Oceanside
. 230.Trees Are a Threat
. 231.Gets Booked, Writes a Book
. 232.Popular Park Reopens
. 233.Swim Classes Begin Soon
. 234.Not Sitting Around
. 235.Get Millions for Homeless
. 236.Tenants Watch Building Burn
. 237.Bathtub Blues
. 238.Blood Drive at Civic Center
. 239.City Hosts 42nd Art Fair
. 240.City and Crime
. 241.Bank Robbery
. 242.Immigration Goes Online
. 243.Jimmy Fixes His Door
. 244.Needs a New Air-Conditioner
. 245.Man Gets 12 Years for Fraud
. 246.Man Shoots Up Post Office
. 247.Murals Are Over 200 Years Old
. 248.Pier Collapses
. 249.Cameras in Police Cars
. 250.A School Girl Sues Her School


. 251.SUV Driver Sends Officer Flying
. 252.Boy Drowns in Neighbor's Pool
. 253.Woman Dies in House Fire
. 254.Plane Crashes into House
. 255.Fishing for Girls
. 256.Shot Next to Christmas Tree
. 257.Stabbed Outside Nightclub
. 258.Fishing Boat Sinks
. 259.The Mysterious Carport Stain
. 260.Lies About Winning Lottery
. 261.Victory Dance Leads to Death
. 262.Eat Your Vegetables
. 263.Honk if You're in a Hurry
. 264.The Man Who Loved Women
. 265.How to Get out of Jury Duty
. 266.The Way to a Man’s Heart
. 267.Female Seeks Mature Male
. 268.Let’s Go Fishing
. 269.Train Wreck “Frees” Cows
. 270.Valuable Guitar Found
. 271.Stepmother Kills Herself
. 272.Beautiful Teacher Smiles
. 273.Are Criminals Taking Over LA?
. 274.Police Arrest Happy Van Driver
. 275.Say Your Prayers
. 276.The Final Phone Call
. 277.Almost Perfect Children
. 278.There Goes the Neighborhood!
. 279.Let’s Go to Vegas!
. 280.Squirrel Attacks Woman
. 281.To Save His Baby
. 282.English Is Confusing
. 283.Pump Up the Tires
. 284.Don’t Go Swimming
. 285.The Park That Went to the Dogs
. 286.Can You Spare a Carburetor?
. 287.Golf Like a Girl
. 288.Take Me Out to the Ball Game
. 289.Take This Job and Shove It
. 290.Where Did That Book Go?
. 291.When You’ve Got Your Health
. 292.That ‘New Car’ Smell
. 293.Inviting Poor Student to Dinner
. 294.When I'm in the Bathroom
. 295.It Was an Old, Worthless Clock
. 296.Five-Finger Discount on Candy
. 297.Collecting Seashells
. 298.At the Store Entrance
. 299.We Will See the World
. 300.Get Me a Caffe Latte




. 301.The Slow Computer-1
. 302.The Slow Computer-2
. 303.The Careful Reader
. 304.Avoid the Flu
. 305.Magician Attracts Women
. 306.US Border Patrol
. 307.Car Shopping in California
. 308.Happy Anniversary
. 309.“Read All about It!”
. 310.A Factory Worker
. 311.Bad Pork
. 312.Don’t Eat the Meat
. 313.Copper Robbers
. 314.Weekly Driving Lessons-1
. 315.Weekly Driving Lessons-2
. 316.Laundry Day-1
. 317.Laundry Day-2
. 318.The Bargain CD Set-1
. 319.The Bargain CD Set-2
. 320.It’s All Over
. 321.The New Clothes-1
. 322.The New Clothes-2
. 323.Food as Punishment
. 324.US Passports Outsourced
. 325.The Demanding Son
. 326.A Practical Joke
. 327.The Dead Pedestrian
. 328.Bad News, Good News
. 329.The Cluster Balloonist
. 330.The Rude Clerk
. 331.The Tax Charge
. 332.The Fire in the Hills-1
. 333.The Fire in the Hills-2
. 334.The Vacuum Cleaner Filter-1
. 335.The Vacuum Cleaner Filter-2
. 336.The Rental Car-1
. 337.The Rental Car-2
. 338.The Marathon Cheater
. 339.School Bus Crashes
. 340.Don’t Take My Property
. 341.New Law for Taco Trucks
. 342.The Refund-1
. 343.The Refund-2
. 344.Shut Your Mouth
. 345.TSA’s New Policy-1
. 346.TSA’s New Policy-2
. 347.I’m Pregnant
. 348.Court Approves Same-Sex Marriage
. 349.Impolite to His Brother
. 350.Protecting the Public
. 351.Malibu to License Paparazzi
. 352.I'm Moving to NY
. 353.The Heart Attack-1
. 354.The Heart Attack-2
. 355.Let's Speak English

THE END






Update: October 16th, 2016.
PayPal về email:
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Jimmy Ton
4369 46 St.
San Diego, CA 92115



Việt Nam chuyển tới:
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ACB Châu Văn Liêm, TPHCM



Ý kiến về Quỹ VietDitru

*THÔNG TIN QUAN TRỌNG: Do tình hình dịch COVID-19 diễn biến phức tạp, từ ngày 19/3, Đại Sứ Quán và Lãnh Sự Quán Hoa Kỳ sẽ ngừng phỏng vấn cấp xét thị thực. Toàn bộ lịch hẹn từ ngày 19/3 trở đi sẽ bị huỷ. Xem thông tin chi tiết

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Update: July 23rd, 2019.